Monday, September 19, 2016

GCF: Things You Wish You Would Hear

 



From the GCF Archives

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GCF: Things You Wish You Would Hear

From your auto mechanic:
"That part is much less expensive than I thought."
"I've never seen anyone maintain his car as well as you do."
"You could get that done more cheaply at the garage down the street."
"It was just a loose wire - No charge."

From a store clerk:
"The computerized cash register is down. I'll just add up your
purchases with a pencil and paper."
"We're sorry we sold you defective merchandise. We'll pick it up at
your home and bring you a new one, or give you a complete refund -
whichever you prefer."

From a contractor:
"Whoever worked on this before sure knew what he was doing."
"I think I came in a little high on that estimate."

From a dentist:
"I think you're flossing too much."
"I won't ask any questions until I take the pick out of your mouth."

From a restaurant server:
"I think it's presumptuous for a waiter to volunteer his name, but
since you ask, it's Tim."
"I was slow and inattentive. I cannot accept any tip."

From a telemarketing person:
"I'm sorry, did I reach you at a bad time? Here's my number...just
call me back if you would like to hear my sales pitch."
"I understand that you are not interested. Thank you for your time."
"Click" (Them hanging up)

From your boss:
"You look tired today. Take the rest of the day off."
"The company offered me a 25% raise, but I told them that you
deserved it more than I do."

From your teacher/professor:
"Homework is unproductive and too time consuming."
"I do not like teaching assistants, so I will be available at all
times to answer your questions."

From a tech support technician:
"Just press the space bar and everything will be fine."

From your doctor:
"You are in better shape than someone half your age!"
"This is such an interesting case, I'll treat you for free just for
the learning experience."
"Take this pill once a month and you'll be at your perfect weight
without exercise or changing your diet."

From the Psychic Hotline:
"I see that you will be scammed out of a lot of money in the near future."

From a telephone answering system:
"If you would like to speak to a human being, press one."

From a clothing salesperson:
No, that looks too big. Let's try a smaller size."

From the IRS:
"We mad a mistake. You only received half of what your tax return
should have been."

----------- Today's saying or thought -------------------------

I did a push-up today. Well, actually I fell down and had to use
my arms to get back up ... so close enough. Now I need chocolate!

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